Bush to Lift Ban on Cloning After Idea of “Bush-lings”

In an effort to bring human cloning to a legal reality, a private research company made a proposal straight to the president himself. In a letter addressed to Mr. Bush the company disclosed information about the perks and benefits that cloning could accomplish that he was not already aware of. Shortly after the letter was read, the President called an emergency meeting of Congress to discuss the contents.

During the discussion the issue of human cloning was once again put under hot debate only this time the president was pushing for the advancement in research and development rather than voting against the proposal. The contents of the letter are mostly unknown but the first two paragraphs have been divulged to the press.

Dear Mr. President,
It has recently come to our attention that you are not fully aware of all the benefits that a human cloning program could have, especially in your case. With recent computer generated models we are positive that cloning would have a beneficial impact on society. Among these new benefits include:

• The elimination of an energy crisis
• A decline in the nations drug use
• The creation of miniature presidents to take on some of your important duties, we have dubbed them bush-lings.

The letter is 15 pages long and is not said to explain how cloning could accomplish the first two new benefits. The letter, however, is said to go into great depth on the idea of bush-lings and came with a DVD of Austin Powers 2 and predicted pictures of what a bush-ling would look like. When asked about the letter, Harold Pincher, a lead scientist and genetic engineer told us that they just tried to appeal to the Presidents needs, and that they knew this would grab his attention.

When asked if Bush-lings were the reason for his immediate reversal of opinion, President Bush gave a long-winded answer that included phrases such as “national security,” “technological breakthrough,” “satisfaction of Laura,” “my dad,” “where am I,” and “ambassador to Egypt.” It has not yet been deciphered what he actually meant but it does appear as though cloning will now appear to have the legal go-ahead for further development.